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    FUNNY JOKES!

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    nerds
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    funny

    Post by nerds on Wed May 04, 2011 11:06 pm

    [strike]may isang nursing na sumakay sa jeep.....
    nangungulangot yung nursing student at tinanong cya nang matanda anak ano kinukuha mo dyan???sagot niya...nursing po .......LoLa.......ay akala ko kulangot...

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Wed May 04, 2011 11:19 pm

    Holy Week Litany of Prayers
    Santa Maria....ipanalangin nyo po kami...
    San Isidro.....bigyan niyo kami nang ulan...
    Santa Lucia....palinawin ninyo ang aking mga mata...
    San Roque......nakagat po kami nang aso...
    San Antonio....nawawala po ang cellphone ko...
    Santa Clara....tama na po marami na akong anak...
    Santo Tomas....ipasa niyo kami
    Sn Pedro.......nasa Laguna po ba kami??
    San Lazaro.....tumataya na po kami
    Santa Ana......tumataya din po ako
    San Juan.......ay c JV,o!
    San Miguel.....sarap maging barkada...
    Sta. Mesa......para na po sa kanto...

    ***********
    Twisted Evil

    nerds
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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:30 pm

    What do u get when u solve 2 489 000x6 788 978+1 904 005%123x678 765 897=






    __________________
    confuse Exclamation

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:30 pm

    What do u get when u solve 2 489 000x6 788 978+1 904 005%123x678 765 897=






    __________________
    confuse Exclamation

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:33 pm

    may roong nag a eye ball........
    babae.....Ikaw ba c Zabala???
    lalake....OO....ikaw ba c anna yung ka txt mate ko???
    babae.....haaa????ay sori wrong send.....


    ***________***
    * nyiek * affraid

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    funny

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:42 pm

    DOK....Hindi mo dapat ikahiya 'yang amoy nang kili kili mo...dapat mo ngang ipagmalaki yan....

    Patient.....bakit naman dok??

    DOK....kasi pinag pawisan mo yan.... Evil or Very Mad





    ***____***
    wew*
    Laughing Shocked

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    funny

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:51 pm

    ***__________________***
    WeW*****Laughing


    may 3 CP na nag uusap......
    CP1(bulok na cellphone...)......mga tol! pasensiya na hindi ako makakasama sa gimik natin!masama ang pakiramdam ko para akong malo_lowbatt!!! Exclamation

    CP2(touchscreen).......hehehematanda na kasi ...low_tech pa...

    CP3(slide).......hehehe...tama ka... Razz
    tongue Laughing

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:52 pm

    ***__________________***
    WeW*****Laughing

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by nerds on Thu May 05, 2011 10:57 pm

    Lovelyjoy Rosales wrote:ATTY: Inday, pwede mo bang idiskrayb dito sa korte ang taong nangreype sa'yo?


    INDAY: Maitim, panot, tagyawatin, pango ilong, at bungal...



    SUSPEK: Sige!...mang-asar ka pa!!



    ***__________________***
    WeW*****Laughing

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by zoie on Fri Sep 30, 2011 2:19 pm

    ,,hi, i'm new. lol!

    DMV
    A man is at DMV.
    [DMV Worker] Name, please?
    [Man] Abdul Khan.
    [DMV Worker] Sex?
    [Man] Yes. Three to five times a week.
    [DMV Worker] No, no… I mean, male or female?
    [Man] Both male and female. And, sometimes with camel.
    [DMV Worker] Holy cow!
    [Man] Yes, I did one time with a cow, too.
    [DMV Worker] But isn ´ t that hostile?
    [Man] Horse style, doggy style, any style!
    [DMV Worker] Oh dear!
    [Man] No, no! ….. No Deer…….. Deer run too fast! )

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:26 pm

    May tatlong Vampira:


    RICH VAMPIRE: Oorder ako ng fresh blood.
    ORDINARY VAMPIRE: Sa akin isang order na dinuguan.
    POOR VAMPIRE: Hot water na lang sa akin.
    WAITER: Bakit hot water lang po.?
    POOR VAMPIRE: Nakapulot kasi ako ng napkin sa kanto. Mag-tsa tsaa na lang ako... Hahaha!


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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:27 pm

    Complete Version:


    Dad: Anak bili mo ko soft drinks.
    Anak: Coke o Pepsi?
    Dad: Coke!
    Anak:Diet o Regular?
    Dad: Regular!
    Anak:Bote O Can?
    Dad: Bote!
    Anak: 8 oz. o Litro?
    Dad: Punyeta! Tubig na lang!
    Anak: Natural o Mineral?
    Dad: Mineral!
    Anak: Malamig o Hindi?
    Dad: Hampasin kaya kita ng walis?
    Anak: Tambo o ting ting?
    Dad: Animal ka!
    Anak: Baka o Baboy?
    Dad: Layas!
    Anak: Ngayon o bukas?
    Dad: Ngayon na!!!
    Anak: Hatid mo ko Indi?
    DAd: Patayin kaya kita?
    Anak: Saksakin o barilin?
    Dad: Babarilin!!
    Anak: Sa Ulo o Tiyan?
    Dad: Pesteeeee!!!!
    Anak: Ipis o Daga??
    Dad: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:28 pm

    Panalangin:


    Sa loob ng simbahan ng Quiapo, isang batang pulubi ang mataimtim na nanalangin sa Diyos.

    Pulubi: "Panginoon kung maaari po sana ay bigyan ninyo ako ng sampung piso dahil gutom na gutom na po ako."

    Narinig sya ng isang pulis na kasalukuyan ding nagsisimba at bumilib sya sa katatagan ng bata sa pananampalataya sa Diyos. Sa kanyang habag ay dumukot sya ng limang piso at iniabot sa bata na ang sabi: "Amang, narinig ng Diyos ang panalangin mo at heto tanggapin mo ang perang ito at ibili mo ng pagkain".

    Tumingala ang bata sa pulis, kinuha nya ang limang pisong iniabot at muling yumuko para manalangin: "Panginoon, salamat po sa pagdinig ninyo sa aking panalangin, pero sana naman po sa uli-uli wag na ninyong pararaanin pa sa pulis, kasi malaki na ang bawas".

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:28 pm

    Parachute:


    Sakay ng eroplano ang Kapitan at mga baguhang paratroopers...
    Kapitan: Oh, Erap lundag na.
    Erap: Kapitan p'wede po bang magtanong bago ako lumundag?
    Kapitan: Ano 'yooon?
    Erap: Paano po kung hindi bumuka itong parachute ko?
    Kapitan: 'Wag kang mag-alala bata, may usapan na kami ng Supplier. Kapag hindi bumuka... papalitan!


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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:29 pm

    In a party:


    In a party, a handsome guy approached a girl and asked;
    are you going to dance??
    The girl felt so happy that someone finally asked her and she said;
    "yes" and the guys said "that's good, can I have your chair??"

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:30 pm

    Parehong Lasing:


    Dalawang lasing ang nag-uusap sa bar.
    Lasing1: Oi pare, ang gwapo mo!
    Lasing2: Pare ikaw din.!
    At malakas na halakhak ang lumabas sa bibig ng 2 lasing BwaHaHaHa.
    Lasing1: Ang birthday ko, October 15 1984, ikaw pare kailan birthday mo?
    Lasing2: Aba! October 15 din ako, at 1984 din 'yong birth year ko!
    Lasing 1 at 2: BwaHaHAHa!
    Lasing2: Pare, nagtapos ako ng high school sa Manila High. Ikaw pare?
    Lasing1: Ha? Akalain mong don din ako nagtapos!
    Eh ang name ng tatay ko ay Rudy at ang ang nanay ko si Maria.
    wag mong sabihin na 'yon din name ng parents mo?
    Lasing2: Pare, 'yon din pangalan nila! Ang apelyido ko Pascual, sa 'yo
    Lasing1: Pascual din pare, pareho tayo! BwaHaHaHa!
    (narinig sila ng bartenter at binulungan nya ang katabi nya)
    Bartenter: Tol', 'yong kambal na Pascual lasing na naman.

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:31 pm

    Madamot:

    Juan: Oys, ano yan? Pinya? Pahingi naman dyan.

    Pedro: Pahingi? Nasaan ka noong nagbubungkal ako ng lupa sa ilalim ng init ng araw? Nasaan ka noong nagtatanim ako habang kumukulog, kumikidlat at
    bumubuhos ang malakas na ulan? Nasaan ka noong oras na nag-aani ako na nagkalat ang maraming ahas sa dadaanan ko, noong naghihirap ako sa pagpasan ng pinya? Nasaan ka?

    Juan: Nakakulong kasi ako noon! Nakapatay ako ng madamot!

    Pedro: Ganun ba?
    Kuha ka na, kahit ilan!
    May langka pa doon!

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:33 pm

    natatae ako








    ..........................

    pag nakikita ko

    ...........................








    ang mukha mo Laughing

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:35 pm

    carding:cute ka ba teh?


    ate:oo


    carding:ano ka aso ka ba teh?

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:37 pm

    cute ka?


    sinong nagsabi??



    nanay mo??? cheers

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 4:06 pm

    A boy took a knife and started writing his girlfriend’s name on his arm.
    Several minutes later, he started crying like crazy.
    Why?
    WRONG SPELLING. Very Happy

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 4:08 pm

    Easiest ways to die:

    Smoke a cigar daily… You’ll die 10 years early.

    Have a drink daily… You’ll die 30 years early.
    ...
    But love someone who doesn’t love you… You’ll die daily

    lovelyrosales
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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 4:13 pm

    7 qualities of true FRIEND!

    SWEET
    INTENSE
    ROMANTIC
    ADMIRABLE
    UNDERSTANDING
    LOYAL
    OBEDIENT

    in short... S.I.R.A.U.L.O.

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 4:14 pm

    Pwede ka Bang
    "MAKANTOT"?
    .
    .
    .

    M - Aging
    A - King
    K - Aibigan na
    A - Aagapay at
    N - Agmamahal ng
    T - Otoo sa lahat ng
    O - ras at
    T - apat sa lahat ng bagay

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

    Post by lovelyrosales on Sun Dec 04, 2011 4:16 pm

    Hindi porket lagi kamming umiinom..
    ay ttawagin na kaming lasinggo.. hindi nman lagi
    ung lasa ng alak ang aming hinahanap kundi ung..

    pgkakaibigang nakukumpleto.

    Prblemang Nakaklimutan

    Samahan na tumitibay

    at Pangrap na Nabubuo sa bawat TAGAY...

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    Re: FUNNY JOKES!

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